Scams, lies, and secrets.

Did you know that financial scams that target seniors are considered " the crime of the century"?
Our seniors are less likely to report fraud because they are ashamed at having fallen for the scam, or they have no idea how, or who to report the scam. These scams are often difficult to prosecute and are considered a low-risk crime, but these scams can devastate a senior. 

According to the National Council Of Aging, counterfeit drugs scams on the internet are prevalent. Senior who are searching for better prices on their medications. The danger is HUGE. First paying for medications that can't help them, and risking their health by taking medications when they have no idea what is in them. 

 Below are some suggestions from AARP on how to protect our vulnerable seniors from the mean spirited people who prey on them. 

Talk with your victimized parents about how their experience could be important for other people facing the same situation. | The elderly lose billions a year to scammers — and you may be at a loss on how to protect them. It's a common concern among the boomer-aged children of the oldest Americans.

In many scams, your parents may be targeted more often than other age groups and fall victim more often, too. And once burned, they may be hit up again as easy marks.
All this is made easier for the scammers if you live elsewhere, unable to run interference on incoming phone calls, emails and mailed letters from con artists. 

Giving your parents stern warnings or demanding power of attorney to control their finances may seem like the way to go — but often those tactics come with the nasty emotional fallout.

"When protectors take over finances or lecture parents about their mistake, it plays right into the scammers' hands by threatening the target's independence," says Anthony Pratkanis, a social psychologist at the University of California, Santa Cruz, and coauthor of Weapons of Fraud with AARP's Douglas Shadel. "For scam victims to admit they were wrong means they're stupid and unable to take care of themselves," Shadel said.
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So how can you help without hurting their feelings? Here are four approaches that might work:

1. Don't just tell your parent to hang up or throw out the letter

Have a talk about why. You can't win a contest you didn't enter, Dad. You never have to pay fees to collect lottery winnings, Mom. Government agencies don't make unsolicited phone calls and never ask for personal information — why would they? They've already got it on file.

2. Don't shame or blame 

Remind them what they taught you decades ago: Don't trust strangers — especially those seeking personal information and money.

3. Try some reverse psychology 

If you become aware that an aged parent is playing a sweepstake or making a "double your money" investment, ask how you can do the same. Psychologists say this tactic sometimes prompts a warning — your parent doesn't want you to lose money, too. That's your cue to ask, "Then why do you do it?" This could start a conversation that helps the parent come to terms with the scam.

4. Turn patsies into protectors

Talk with your victimized parents about how their experience could be important for other people facing the same situation: "The authorities are looking for these guys, so maybe you can help others." This may make them willing to part with the details of what happened.
In the meantime, keep alert for warning signs. If you don't live nearby, ask a trusted neighbor to be your eyes and ears. What kind of mail is coming into the house? Does there seem to be a pattern of scam callers on the phone? These could suggest that your folks are on "sucker lists" for sweepstakes and "investment opportunities." These lists are developed and sold among scammers to identify past victims as candidates for future fraud.
Consider setting up online access to your parents' bank and credit card accounts. This will let you watch over their finances from afar. Look for unusual monthly charges, big and small.

Know the risks. The most common scams against the elderly include phony lottery and sweepstakes seeking upfront fees to enter or collect; government impostors posing as reps from Social Security and Medicare; the grandparents scam, in which a grandchild is supposedly in deep trouble; offers for free or discount medications (including anti-ageing drugs) or medical equipment; and credit card fraud and investment schemes.
Women are twice as likely as men to fall for elder financial abuse, especially when they're in their 80s and when living alone. Either gender with a Type A personality — used to making quick decisions — most frequently falls for "act now!" scams like fake lotteries. For any scam, an especially vulnerable time is the three years after some major stress, such as the loss of a spouse or a change in health or housing.
Other steps to consider

• Unlist your parents' phone number so scammers can't get it. Consider replacing the landline with a cell phone, where scam calls are less frequent.

• Put your parents' addresses on opt-out lists with the Direct Marketing Association. Once done, legitimate vendors won't send junk mail, and parents will know that what arrives is likely from scammers. That mail should be reported to the U.S. Postal Inspection Service.

• Check their credit reports at AnnualCreditReport.com to ensure that fraudulent new accounts haven't been opened in their names.

• If Mom and Dad won't heed your warnings, AARP can help. You or they can call the AARP Fraud Fighter Call Center at 800-646-2283 toll-free. Expect a voicemail greeting, but messages are usually returned within 48 hours. Says program director Jean Mathisen: "We get a lot of calls from children asking that we contact their parents" about possible scams, and even more from elders suspecting that they have been caught in a scam. "But I don't want to tell my children," they say.

Sid Kirchheimer writes about consumer issues for AARP Media.

 

My Grandparents, my Heroes!

My passions for spending time with seniors started early on in my life. As a young girl, I was very attached to my grandparents, Joe and Rosie. At that time in my life, we all lived in England. Every Friday night my grandparents would take either the bus or train from Liverpool to where were lived in a small English town a couple of hours away. They would stay until after tea on Sunday and then hop on a bus or train back home to Liverpool.

I recall the joy I felt at the end of the week knowing we could be together for the weekend. When my grandparents were visiting, I often recall turning down offers to play with my friends. I much preferred to spend time with my grandparents.

  

My grandmother, Rosie, was loved by all. She was one heck of a cook! I especially remember her home-made dumplings she would make for chicken soup and the smell of the kippers she would fry with eggs for breakfast.

  

My grandfather, Joe, could be a little tough sometimes; however, I was the exception. I was his princess, and I loved every minute it. He was a talented carpenter that could build just about anything.

This is one of my favourite memories of my grandfather:

Besides being a boxer, if there was one thing my grandfather was known for, it was his love for horse-racing. Every Saturday morning he would get up early, find his newspaper, and choose his horses for the day. He would then ask me to close my eyes and point to the name of a horse that was running that day so he would place a bet for me. I loved it!

  

But what I loved more is that every Saturday for many years the horse I chose always won its race! I could hardly wait for my grandfather to return home so I could find out how much, as he called it, “pocket change” I had won for that day. I think what he loved the most is how I would greet him at the door, giddy and giggly and always so happy to see him.

Sadly the time came when my family left England and moved to America. I hated being away from my grandparents. We often spoke on the telephone but it was not the same. Within a few months of us moving so far away, my grandfather went to live in heaven. I was crushed! I recall thinking that maybe because he loved me so much, that when I left, he died of a broken heart.

It was many, many years into my adult life when one day it occurred to me that my horse, the one I had chosen every Saturday morning with my eyes closed, had likely never won a single race. But my grandfather wanted me to be a winner and he made sure that I was.

My grandmother Rosie lived to the ripe old age of 88. And was as spunky as ever until her battle with colon cancer reunited her for eternity with my grandfather Joe, the love of her life.

The memories of my grandparents have carried me through many sad times. Even though it’s been over 40 years since my grandfather passed, I still miss him. I miss our talks, the silly songs he would sing, and, of course, our Saturday mornings picking out the winning horses.

I feel my grandparents legacy is such a gift. I would like to think that, because of them, I have learned to be a loving grandmother to my grandchildren. Long after my grandparents left this world, through me my grandchildren will see their great, great grandparents' lights shining brightly forever.

Easing the Squeeze, The Sandwich Generation.

The balancing act can be very stressful for the so- called sandwich generation. The term sandwich generation, refers to adults who are working full time, typically between the ages of 40 and 50 and are “sandwiched”   between their own families and their aging parents.

As Americans live longer, the demand for some level of assistance is on the rise. Statistics show the senior population (65+), will double by the year 2030, growing from 35 million to 74 million equaling 21% of the population. According to the PPIC, by 2030 over a million seniors will need some sort of assistance with daily life. As long-term care cost continues to rise, burdened families are looking for outside resources and support systems.

Although there is no real gender bias, women are more likely to be affected by dual roles, causing more stress than ever before. Women that are being “sandwiched” tend to underestimate the toll this may take on their health, personal time, relaxation time, relationships, sleep, and finances.

It is possible to manage multiple family members with our losing your mind.  Outside help is a lifeline for the sandwich generation, but finding that support can be another form of stress.

Let Errands & More be your eyes and ears: If you live close by, or across the country we can observe and update you as to the daily activities of your loved one. You can rest assured that they are in good hands.